


How To Go On?

by ChloeGreen1998



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Death, Lots Of Sad, M/M, Sad Ending, Sad sad sad, i furiously said i like being sad whilst writing this, i'm meant to be writing my dissertation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-12
Updated: 2021-01-12
Packaged: 2021-03-17 08:27:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,451
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28722105
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChloeGreen1998/pseuds/ChloeGreen1998
Summary: Atsumu was in the middle of cooking dinner, Osamu and Suna talking loudly in the living room, Sakusa at the shop picking something up last minute. That's when Atsumu got the phone call.
Relationships: Miya Atsumu & Miya Osamu, Miya Atsumu & Suna Rintarou, Miya Atsumu/Sakusa Kiyoomi, Miya Osamu/Suna Rintarou
Comments: 10
Kudos: 84





	How To Go On?

**Author's Note:**

> Feel like saying sorry isn't going to help this one lads.
> 
> I don't know why okay.
> 
> I'm writing my dissertation on Banana Fish and this just happened.

Ever since he was a child, Atsumu has struggled being alone. Being a twin was always a massive benefit in his eyes, someone to always be there beside him no matter how many times the two of them tell each other their own hatred towards one another. And then, when they moved on from high school and Atsumu went pro in volleyball, he's had his teammates to be attached at the hip to especially Kiyoomi, his boyfriend, his single most favourite person on Earth. It was hard for Atsumu to pinpoint the exact time that Kiyoomi had become the main sunshine in his solar system of people but he was happy that he was. No matter what, no matter how much Kiyoomi tried to pretend he didn't, Atsumu knew that Kiyoomi loved him so much and he was so thankful.

Some people enjoyed to tell the two of them that they were completely different. Kiyoomi was quiet, reserved and blunt when he needed to be whereas Atsumu didn't really like stepping on the toes of other people, was loud and very obnoxious, the exact kind of person Kiyoomi promised himself that he would never fall for but he did. Atsumu had worn him down especially when they happened to be playing on the same team, the two of them just seemed to fit together like two pieces of a very confusing puzzle. They loved each other and you only had to spend two seconds with them to see that and to understand how good they are for one another.

Of course they had their good days and bad days especially when it came to Kiyoomi's mental health but they always knew what the other one needed and always respected boundaries. They also were still very close with Osamu and Suna. If Kiyoomi had to choose his best friends, he'd probably say those two. They all hung out together as much as possible. At first, Kiyoomi was so nervous around Osamu and Suna because they knew Atsumu better than anyone, they cared about him a lot and they'd all gone to high school together, Kiyoomi didn't think he fit in with them but he quickly slotted in with them and they were a four, a group that hardly spent more than a couple of weeks away from each other.

And, of course, the accident had to happen when Osamu and Suna were at Kiyoomi and Atsumu's apartment. When reflecting on it, Atsumu was grateful that the two of them were there with him when it happened, when he got the call, when his body gave up on him. He didn't know what would have happened to them if they weren't there to literally catch him when he fell.

"Omi Omi is taking so long," Atsumu grumbled to himself as he stirred the soup in the pot, he'd offered to cook for them all for their get together, definitely not just to spite Osamu who said that Atsumu can't cook for shit. He'd prepared a three course meal to prove him wrong because that's true sibling spite and Kiyoomi had run out to the shop to buy a couple of things they needed for the desert. "Talking of the devil," he said as his phone rang on the counter. The loud laughter of Osamu was radiating from the living room where Suna must have told the funniest joke.

"Omi, where are ya?"

"I'm sorry is this Miya Atsumu?" Atsumu glanced at the screen to make sure it was definitely Kiyoomi's number there. His stomach froze over in that moment. It was never good was it when someone answered the phone when you were expecting it to be someone else. "Sir?"

"Yes,this is Miya Atsumu," he knew that his voice had started to shake, could hear that the conversation had stopped in the living room, could feel the other two staring at him. "Where's Omi?"

"I'm sorry sir, I'm a paramedic at the scene but it appears Sakusa Kiyoomi was involved in a hit and a run and died at the scene." The phone dropped from Atsumu's hand and before it had even hit the floor, Osamu grabbed it. Atsumu's knees buckled from beneath him and he hit the floor hard.

"Hello? I'm sorry this is Atsumu's brother, can you tell me what's going on?" That was all Atsumu heard before the world around him became silent. He wanted to cry and scream but nothing seemed to come out, his whole body had gone numb, it felt like an out of body experience. Osamu was kneeling in front of him, was saying something, Suna joined him but he couldn't hear them. Kiyoomi was dead. Kiyoomi had left him, he was dead, in a hit and run.

"Atsumu, Atsumu, I need you to tell me if you can hear me?"

"I-I-I," he didn't get to finish before he felt two sets of arms wrap around his body, he knew that he was leaning against Osamu from the cologne that was now clogging his nose. All of his senses seemed to come back at once and he pushed his best friends away and vomited all over the floor. "Omi," he whispered, "Omi, this is such a sick joke but it is a sick joke isn't it? it's a joke isn't it?!" He was shouting now, he knew he was but he couldn't help it, he grabbed ahold of Osamu's shirt in front of him. "It's a joke, please it's a joke," hot tears poured from his face as he fell into his brother's embrace. "It's a joke 'Samu."

"I'm sorry Sumu, I'm sorry," Osamu repeated, looking at Suna helplessly who had his own tears streaming down his face. Not only had Sakusa become an important part of his life too, the last thing he wanted to see was Atsumu in this kind of true pain. "I wish it was a joke I'm sorry."

"It was a hit and run, the person, the person hit him and left him alone, he must have been so scared Samu he was alone," Atsumu cried, "he was alone, I wasn't with him," he whispered but Osamu knew it was more to himself now.

"I'm sure that you were at the front of his mind Sumu, you know that he loved you so much and was never alone because he had you in his mind," Suna said, coming to kneel down beside Osamu and placing a hand on Atsumu's back. "He was never alone."

Every second that passed felt like an hour for Atsumu, every second without Kiyoomi felt like an hour. He pushed Osamu away and stood up shakily, when Osamu tried to stop him, Atsumu put his hand out to stop him and went towards the door. He stared at the door like he expected Kiyoomi to walk through it and embrace him, tell him that his phone was stolen and that it was a prank call. That he was fine. That it was a sick joke. That he was still alive.

"He's coming back you'll see, he's going to walk through the door any minute and tell me it was all a joke," Atsumu said through his tears, putting his ear to the door like he was listening out for footsteps. "He's coming back," he whispered.

Osamu and Suna felt helpless. All they could do was watch him, watch Atsumu as he broke down again against the door, crying Kiyoomi's name. Suna stepped forward and hauled Atsumu up from the floor and led him towards the couch, wrapping a blanket around him as Osamu cried himself, closing the door to the kitchen. He cleaned the floor and cried grabbing his own phone, when Kiyoomi's phone went straight to voicemail, he wanted to throw it across the room, he wanted to be mad at Kiyoomi for leaving his twin in this state, but, he couldn't.

"How am I suppose to carry on without him?" Atsumu asked against Suna's chest. He buried his face in his friend's shoulder, letting the tears freely flow down his cheeks. "How am I meant to survive without him? I don't want to."

"I know you don't but you have to, Kiyoomi would want you to carry on. I promise. He's going to be watching you and he'll always be proud of you Atsumu." Suna just kept talking to him as Atsumu cried himself to sleep, letting loud sobs dissolve into small sniffles and that's when Suna let go. Let his own tears and sobs come out as he held Osamu tightly.

And, if, for the rest of his life, Atsumu slept on Kiyoomi's side of the bed, nobody needed to talk about it.

**Author's Note:**

> I am SORRY.


End file.
